Arrgh. Y'Hiyeh B'Seder

Man. I wish there was an American equivalent of Y'hiyeh B'Seder. Because, heavens above, we need it. I mean, is there a colloquial English word or words that express that utter nonchalance and relaxation that Israelis exude when saying those words?

It's like nothing can ever go wrong, ever. I mean- it'll all be okay. Always okay, all the time. That should be the new Israeli radio station. "Always Okay, all the time. Y'hiyeh B'Seder."

"Geveret, no worry. It will be there on time, y'hiyeh b'seder."
"Geveret, no worry. The bomb shelter is only four blocks away. Y'hiyeh B'Seder."
"Geveret, Y'hiyeh B'Seder. I know that there is a nuclear missile heading towards us, but no worry. We will be fine."

Just today I had a contractor- who I've called an estimation of about 300 times- that's a rough estimation, not an exaggeration, and told about my deadline- November 30th- say to me, "Don't worry Geveret. Y'hiyeh B'Seder. All will be done before Chanukah."

When informed that Chanukah comes after November 30th, I got a "Don't worry. Y'hiyeh B'Seder."

Traffic? Y'hiyeh B'Seder. Terrorist attacks? Same response. How about international relations? "They all crazy. Y'hiyeh B'Seder."

I'm telling you- either I'm nuts, or they are. But one thing's for sure. Not everything is Y'hiyeh B'Seder.

Motzei Shabbos Maaseh #3- Tazria-Metzorah

Living in Israel, we don't even realize what we speak. I mean, we speak Ivrit, (Hebrew) but that language truly comes from the language of the Torah- Lashon HaKodesh.

Why is Lashon HaKodesh called Lashon HaKodesh- the holy language? Is there something so unique about it that it deserves to be called holy? (Besides for the fact that the Torah is written in it, and so therefore it is holy- it should be holy by itself in order to have the Torah written in it.)

The Rambam in Moreh Nevuchim (Guide to the Perplexed) gives an answer to it, that since Lashon HaKodesh has no bad language- no curses or swear words, therefore, it is called holy. This seems interesting- why does that give it the designation of holiness? Just because it doesn't have bad language?

In this week's parsha, it discusses Tzaaras, leprosy- which is a punishment for speaking Lashon Hara- negative facts about another person. It is very interesting, as it is a unique punishement for that sin.

R' Yerucham Levovitz, former Mashgiach of Mir, states some interesting facts about Tzaaras. Tzaaras is given not as a punishment for speaking negatively about another person, but it is a natural outgrowth of the person's negativity. As if the person himself has a flaw, and that flaw causes the natural outspurt of a physical problem. It's as if the flaw manifests itself on the outward part of a person.

A non kosher animal, known as a Behaimah Temaiah (impure animal), has signs of impurity- that it doesn't have split hooves, or chew it's cud. However, we might think that that is what makes it impure, unfit for Jewish people to eat. The answer is not that- but rather, that because these animals are not-kosher, they innately have this certain impurity, and therefore, it manifests itself on their outward apperance.

The same goes for holiness- if something is innately holy- it will express itself outwardly. There seems to be an outpouring of holiness from something, which expresses itself in the physical world.

That is why Lashon HaKodesh is holy. Because it itself is holy- it's "Kadosh Hu- it is holy"- as the Rambam says, so therefore, it has no bad language. It expresses the holiness in itself, and that is why the world was created and the Torah was written with Lashon HaKodesh.

Dikduk Lessons

I LOVE ISRAEL! I just can't say that enough. Sorry.

I will be the first to admit- the language of Ivrit is hard. I know, English is worse, with all it's "Yotzei Min HaKlall"'s (exceptions to the rule), but even after years of schooling with excellent teachers, and time spent in the Holy Land being spoken to, and speaking back, in Ivrit- my own personal Ivrit is semi-fluent, but riddled with Dikduk mistakes (grammatical).

I understand Ivrit almost perfectly- oftentimes that gets the person I'm talking to confused, as I understand what they are saying, but have a hard time communicating back to them.

But- the Israelis, contrary to popular belief, are teaching me.

A sweet lady in the neighborhood corrects all my dikduk, and teaches me new words- like Smartut, (rag/towel), Economica (the stuff used to clean floors), and other such ideas.

Every cab driver encourages me to speak in my less than excellent Ivrit, and they correct me, and speak back to me, not like I'm hard of hearing, or in a slower tone, since they realize I understand them.

One time- I went to get a copy of a key made- and I forgot the word for copy- l'shachfel (thanks, Jameel :) )- to make a copy....from the word- Kaful- double.

The two men there figured out what I meant- and one went to do it. The other remarked to the first (in Ivrit) that it seems I don't understand Ivrit so well. My shocked look must have done it, because the first said- nope- she understands everything we're saying. And not only that- her spoken Ivrit is probably better than our spoken English!
I was so impressed, and told them so- that yes, I did understand, and no, I'm not an idiot just because I'm not totally fluent in Ivrit.

But, at least they're being patient, and not looking down their noses at me due to the language barrier.

Thank you, kind Israelis. I hope that one day, I'll be able to talk as fast as you!