Things to Do While Sick

So, things just keep going around. By things, I mean viruses, bacteria, and all those stuff that make our lives just ever so joyful.

NBD was sick last week, for five days. Doc said it was just a virus, but boy, do those things last a long time. I caught some sort of cold, which lasted for about 3 days, yet I'm still sniffling and nursing a cough. And now, Mr. NMF has been laid low by something that forced him to leave yeshiva, which means he's really sick. It brings to mind this poem by J.A.P. about husbands and sickness.

So. What to do while you're sick. Or at least, what to do while your family is sick, besides for cooking extra big bowlfuls of 'Jewish penicillin', a.k.a., chicken soup. (By the way, although research has proven that chicken soup does help alleviate the symptoms of a sickness, it doesn't actually cure it. Although, it does help quite a bit!)

The way I see it, if you're really sick, you can't really do much more than sleep in a comfortable bed. If you're semi sick, you have just about enough energy to read a good book. I highly recommend Lawrence Kelleman's book on chinuch, 'To Kindle a Soul', for all those looking for something new to read. If you have the energy, you can use a computer, or call people who you haven't spoken to in quite a while.

But, what it comes down to is this: my household just doesn't function 'well' when they are sick.

Something that has nothing to do with the title of this post- ProfK has an excellent take on the Fort Hood shooting- I myself read immediately on Fox News that the shooter had said "Allah Akbar"- but it took until about page 5 (and let's face it, who reads that long) on the NY Times to get that point across. "Don't jump to conclusions.", Obama says. Well. I'm not jumping, I'm just meandering slowly towards them. Oh, and the New York Post is meandering too.

Judging the News

If you haven't noticed, the news has been rather bad lately. Super Raizy gives a short round up.

The two most horrible things I heard of lately were the case about the mother in Meah Shearim who was arrested for 'starving' her child, thrown into prison for a week without having a psychological evaluation, and then finally released on house arrest, still without an evaluation and not given the chance to see her other children. Finally, the evaluation came back normal, but she is still under scrutiny.

Side 1 in this case: She's a horrible mother who starves her sick child in the oncology unit in Haddassah, and deserves to be thrown into prison. She mistreated him, may have Munchausen syndrome, and won't let the doctors do their job.

Side 2 in this case: She's a mother with a terribly sick child who throws up everything he eats, and is being used as an experimental case in Haddassah's research program, who got thrown into prison without any hearing, trial, or evaluation, and even once she had a psychological evaluation, she couldn't see her other children at all.

So, trying to be unbiased...which side do you think is right? It's hard to tell. The rioting? Not the best response, but it did get her out of prison and into house arrest. I don't know the full story, but I've heard enough about it to show that it might be biased at the highest level. I'm not taking her side, or the other side, but I do think that everyone should know all the facts.

Second piece of bad news? Well, important and prestigious rabbis were caught money laundering and organ selling, and were turned into the FBI. The NY Times Article can explain it in more detail. Personally? There are two sides to this one also.

Side 1: The Rabbis were wrong to do it, (i.e. , someone donates money to 'charity', they deduct a percentage to charity and give the rest back, making it tax deductible.), but it's not so shocking. It happens all the time. When polled among my friends and neighbors, most have said that they have taken a discount in return for paying in cash, or that they know of kollelim who do this routinely. Depressing. It may not be halachically assur, but it isn't the yashar way to do things.

Side 2: They were stealing, they were wrong, and they deserve to be prosecuted.

Not to mention the other side of this story- Shlomo/Solomon Dwek, who acted as an informant and turned them all in. Why? Why would a frum Jew turn others over to the authorities? Isn't that halachically and morally wrong also?

There are always two sides to every news story. Be careful how you read, and how you judge.

Trying to Judge Favorably

I read an article in a magazine this month (no, I'm not telling which, because that would be Lashon Hara), which struck a bad chord in me.

The article was about seeing things from two sides, from both angles, and realizing the different perspectives involved.

It seems that a group of students asked a question about the fact that elderly people get on at the later stops of a long bus route, and then expected the young students to give up their seats for them for the duration of the bus ride. These students felt it was too hard to stand up for an hour bus ride, and they felt that the older people were being "unfair" by even getting on the bus, knowing that the younger generation would have to get up for them.

The article spoke about seeing things from several perspectives, and came to this conclusion:

"The older people really should not get on the bus if there are no available seats. However, if they do get on, then the younger people must vacate their seats for them, at least for part of the ride."

Huh? So, talking about Israel, how could you know if there are no seats on a bus in advance? And that the elderly should walk to earlier stops to get a seat before the young and strong? And, the author is saying that the elderly should feel guilty about getting on? And that the young people have a point as to not getting up for them? I thought that was a mitzva, and we should get up for those who are older than us.

I know that I've gotten up many a time. I've even stood while pregnant, simply to give another person who needed it more a seat. I'm lost and confused.

Someone please help me judge favorably?

Obama Doesn't Like FOX

President Obama isn't quite happy with a certain news station, this article reports. It seems that the President does not like anyone who says anything bad about him, his policies, or his administration.
Interesting. I hope he doesn't ban FOX News, as they seem to be the only news report that gives both sides, the bad and the good.

Newsworthy Notes

Well, there have been lots of stuff and things (colloquial, I know) going on in the news lately, and frankly, although I've been reading it, I just haven't had time to post.

We have guests from America coming to us for the ENTIRE summer- and I've been in a bit of a cleaning frenzy. No, I don't think they'll notice if my bathrooms aren't shiny, but I feel like a clean home shows that a Kollel couple doesn't live in shmutz and dirt, but rather, also maintains the aesthetic appearance of their home.

It's like a Kiddush Hashem (sanctifying G-d's name)- although I'm sure there are those who would say that it doesn't matter at all.

So, what's newsworthy nowadays? Let's see.

The Yeshiva World reported that the number 2 bus has 'unofficially' gone mehadrin, with women, by themselves, moving to the back, and men sitting in front. People commented that it isn't fair to force mehadrin status on a bus without it actually being mehadrin- but I feel that if people do it by themselves, then what's the problem?

I haven't taken the 2 lately, but as long as everyone is behaving 'menschlichdik'- that is, if a woman does sit in the front, she should have the right to, without being the comment of derogatory remarks or deeds- then, again, it shouldn't be a problem.

However, there is a committee working on getting all the mehadrin lines in Yerushalayim canceled. At least, according to the Yeshiva World article. I know that Mr. NMF won't step onto a crowded bus- packed beyond comparison when the doors can't even close properly, if he's going to get squashed between two women. He'll wait for the next one. So, it would be a shame if all the mehadrin lines were closed due to the inappropriate actions of some people who felt that tznius was more important than that 'other' commandment of shaming another Jew (or worse, hurting another Jew) in public.

Let's face it: people can comment quietly, or mention that it would be nice if they would move to the back (quietly) but they most certainly can not shame another Jew. It says in the Gemara (Sotah 10b, if I'm not mistaken) that one should rather jump into a fiery furnace than embarrass another Jew in public. Even for tznius- as proven by the story of Yehudah and Tamar. In that same Gemara, it then equates public embarrassment with murder, immoral actions, and idol worship- all sins that one should rather kill themselves than do.

Why can't women get on the front and men in the back? I have a reason (maybe there are more)- but women are the gender most often accompanied by a stroller, and strollers legally can only enter on the backs of buses for safety reasons. So therefore, women enter on through the back, and to make life easier, they sit in the back as well. Imagine getting on the bus with a heavy stroller, and then having to drag it all the way to the front!

Speaking of strollers, in baby related news- a great-great-great grandchild was born to R' Elyashiv. That child is also related to R' Chaim Kanievsky, and R' Aharon Leib Shteinman. Wow- that kid has yichus! And, such a zechus (privilege) for someone to live to see their great-great-great granchild!

In other child related news, there was a beautiful gathering at the Kotel this past Rosh Chodesh, for fathers and sons, all to say the special Tefilas HaShlah (usually said on Erev Rosh Chodesh Sivan, but that came out on Shabbos), and for a Hachnasas Sefer Torah in memory of Rav Meir Shapiro zt'l- the father of the Daf Yomi movement.

I think that is so beautiful and phenomenal- that everyone would gather like that- parents to say a tefillah for the well being of their children- and for the Daf Yomi movement- it must have been a truly beautiful and heartwarming sight. For all those interested (I'm sure the Shlah wouldn't mind it being said on other times of the year) the Tefillas HaShlah is here.

I'm sure you've all read on SuperRaizy's blog about the new JAP doll- American Girl is putting out a Jewish doll, living in the tenements on the Lower East Side, with a grandmother called Bubbie. Sadly, she and her family are forced to work on Shabbos to make a living. But, at least the people at American girl got the situation right!

I never really heard about this, until I read the NY Times article. It seems that there was discrimination against Jewish doctors in the US during the time of WWII. They didn't want to hire or accept so many Jews as doctors, due to the war and anti-semitism. Yet, one doctor, Dr. Putnam, stood up, and hired the top Jewish neurologists of his day. And he was fired for it. Wow- what a story. He was a brave and courageous person.

Finally- Neve Yaakov residents are arguing over a shul...on wheels. Depressingly, the city has not given Neve Yaakov money for a permanent structure, nor allowed the construction of one, so therefore, the residents put a shul on wheels that would change places every three months.

Yet, there have been complaints about it, from both sides- those that don't want a chareid shul in their area, as Neve Yaakov is slowly becoming 'black'- and from those charedim who just want a permanent shul of their own. I hope that one day, disputes like this will be resolved, and all of Am Yisroel, the Jewish nation, will join together as one whole.

That's my news roundup for the week! Phew. Now, back to scrubbing my floors.

Final Wishes

I just recently was skimming news on Yeshiva World (I have a news addiction. I check the NYTimes, MSN, and Yeshiva World almost every day.) when I saw an interesting article that I'd like to share.

It seems that in this article, a grandfather left explicit instructions in his will that only those grandchildren who marry a Jewish person (either by birth or conversion) will inherit. If they do not, then they will be disinherited.

Well, this will is being contested in court by a grandchild who married out of the faith, and the court is leaning towards reversing the will. So, the Agudas Yisroel got involved- as a 'friend' of the court, stating that this is a major decision for almost all Jews, and they feel they should be heard as well. As last reported, they will have a say in the case.

Why is this so interesting? Well, first of all, intermarriage is an issue that affects all Jewish people. We don't care if someone is black, white, purple, gray or pink- we just want our children and grandchildren to marry someone Jewish. If they don't, their children could be not-Jewish- if born of a non-Jewish mother.

Parents throughout the generations have found ways to prevent their children from intermarrying. I recently read the book How To Prevent an Intermarriage by Rabbi Packouz, and in it he details the story of one man who went on a hunger strike until his daughter agreed not to intermarry. Compared to that, someone who just doesn't give money that he rightfully worked for, and that he has control over who he gives it to, seems rather tame.

People disinherit their children for all sorts of reasons. So, a religious reason seems a valid one to me, and I personally don't believe that a court could actually rule that the man's will is invalid. The Agudas Yisroel is getting involved because sometimes money will do what a passionate speech about the beauty of the Jewish nation can't. A will has been used as a tool to prevent intermarriage before, and as such, they want that to continue.

I think his final wishes should be respected, as he cared for his grandchildren and the future of the Jewish nation.

Some News Reports

Sorry this blog is taking a bit of a war slant right now- but that is the news. Sigh. Although I do have some interesting and thought provoking posts coming- they've been put on the back burner for a bit.
Here's a video that made Mr. NMF and I applaud Mr. Jarrett- and hoped that more reporters would be like him. It's almost laughable to see how he handles the situation.
Enjoy!

Chinuch Atzmai Situation

I've been debating on and off whether to write this post or not.

I would like to state first that I don't know the entire story- as I don't live in this neighborhood- and I have tried to verify if this is true- most sources whom I've talked to have said that it is true.

The only news that reported it was Yeshiva World News- but that makes sense, as it is a problem for the frum Jewish community.

I would also like to remind my readers that I am newly married- I don't have children yet. If I did, I wouldn't want them to be treated like this. I was appalled and shocked when I read the first article, and the second only escalated my fears on how my children might be treated if I raise them in Israel. I spoke to one of my own rabbanim, who said that although it is wrong, the situation should clear itself up, and my children would probably not experience what a lawyer-friend of mine called, "a clear example of segregation and discrimination in today's times."

Such an action could probably lead to people suing one another in the US. A quote from the articles illustrates the 'excuses' given for the segregation.

In addition, the parents of the American girls also signed a document to accept the current realities, namely the separate classes, and now, in the middle of the year, undoing such a reality is not advisable, considering it takes weeks and weeks of intensive work to set up the classes. At present, there are four parallel classes so such a move would impact many many girls.

In short, the separation of the Americans was in no way intended as a punishment, but as a respectable solution to the fact that the children have differences, have difficulty speaking with Israeli girls, and fit together better than attempted integration at this time. We want the girls in the school, and in time, they will acclimate to Eretz Yisrael. The school placed their best teacher in the American class, not wishing to compromise their education in anyway. One can easily understand when there are 10 girls in a classroom who naturally speak English, their native tongue; it does result in a pedagogic and social problem in the classroom. We spoke with rabbonim, experienced professionals and many experts before making a decision as to addressing the social & language gap.

Here are the articles. I'm going to let my readers decide for themselves.
This is the first article printed.
This was the second, and the third. This was the school, and Chinuch Atzmai's response in the fourth- here.

One thing is for sure- as an American planning to stay here in Israel- this shocked me, and made me worry for the future. I hope this will be resolved by the talented rabbaim working on this case- like R' Yitzchak Berkowitz, Rav of Sanhedria Murchevet.